This new year, I have decided to focus more on relational development, understanding more of myself and others, and also to be present (not thinking only of what will happen in the future, but cherishing the current day). With becoming a parent, it motivates me to be the best version that God created me to be and work on any issues that would prevent me from loving Jordanna the best I can.
Recently, I finished reading the book “Making Peace with Prickly People” by Deb Potts. Previously, the books I read about boundaries and relationships were written by males. I liked reading a female’s point of view. This book does a great job of talking about who God is, who I am, the different personality types of people (choleric, sanguine, melancholic, and phlegmatic), and how to love myself well and love others well.
I had not read about these personality types before, and Deb did a great job pointing out different people in the Bible that God used that all had the different personality types.
I love the NIV version of the Bible, when reading the love verses in I Corinthians 13. It hits home a lot when it says, love keeps no record of wrongs and love is not easily angered. These are things I continually have to ask the Spirit to empower me to do.
The main thing that really resonated with me in this book was when she talks about forgiveness and making peace with people. She lists three things that you must practice and do, when you truly have forgiven someone.
1) I promise not to bring the subject up again in our relationship.
This is so on point with not keeping a record of wrongs.
2) I promise not to bring the subject up with other people for the purpose of slander.
She talks about how bringing a situation to a mentor or close friend for the purpose of wise counsel is good, but how when we just want to vent or rehash the situation, it is a way of getting back at the other person passively.
3) I promise to avoid bringing the situation up with myself.
This is another way to passively hurt the person and allowing toxic memories to fester does not help our thoughts or help us to love the other person.
This book helped me refocus on the fact that I am responsible for me, for my thoughts, and for loving others well. I’m so grateful to have this mindset in the start of 2018.
So, what are you saying yes to this year? Are you reading beneficial books? Are you loving people well? Are you harboring unforgiveness? Choose to say yes to living a joyful, fruitful life… we are all works in progress.